355. Why don't I enjoy sex that much?
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Our 20s are sold to us as the decade of peak desire - full of passion, spontaneity, and effortless intimacy. But for so many of us, that isn’t the reality. When libido dips or fluctuates, it can feel confusing, isolating, and even shameful. In this episode, we ask why it is so common to struggle with libido in our 20s, what’s actually happening beneath the surface when desire feels distant, and how to make sense of the emotional and physical shifts that come with it.
We explore:
• How it feels when our libido fluctuates
• Why so many of us struggle with this in our 20s
• The dual control theory of sexual response
• Libido as a reflection of safety
• The role of hormones, stress and mental health
• Identity development and the impact of shame
• Tips to reconnect with pleasure
If you’ve ever wondered why you don’t feel the same drive as others seem to, this episode is for you.
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The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.
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