Hey Meathead, 

Yah, I’m talkin’ to you. I’m from Omaha. I had a warehouse that I used to smuggle drugs and guns. The warehouse was full and I was planning on making a final big sell before I could retire and live a simple life. It was all set in a few days when one of my workers ratted me out. 

The cops surrounded my place and I was cornered. I thought about putting up a fight but there was only one of me and more cops than I cared to count. I was about turn myself in when a warning alert blasted from the radio that a tornado was coming. 

The plan was then to wait out the storm and see if there was an opening to escape. I had my warehouse well-fortified and when I looked through the peephole I saw it was flying off the ground. Hours passed until I landed here in Oz. I stepped out of my warehouse carrying my peacemaker, when a cop car landed a few yards from me. The cop dangled from his vehicle before seeing me. 

Looking at me he said, "Oh, Humbug!" before reaching.... 

Wait a moment.... You want to know more, then buy this stupid book written by two wack jobs who should be wearing long jackets. There’s witches, scarecrows, a cowardly lion, an.... oh yeah…two British fellas who seem to know way too much. Now scram! I ain’t sayin’ nothin’ else. 

Authors: 

Wakii Reeder enjoys the classics. After, he like to turn them inside out and outside in, sack them up high and make them tumble on down. After some tears, sweat, and blood (mostly from paper cuts), he tries to produce literature that will make his listeners cherish it for the rest of their lives or want him to donate his organs or both. 

Classic authors who have influenced Wakii include (but are not limited to): L. Frank Baum, Carlo Collodi, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Washington Irving, Herman Melville, Edgar Allan Poe, Robert Louis Stevenson, and Mark Twain. 

*** 

Fickal MacSciance wanted to be a superhero when he grew up. He wanted to have lasers come out of his nose and have the ability to turn objects into man eating guinea pigs. When that plan fell through, he decided to try writing.