Episódios

  • Tom Shows Harland Williams His Chocolate Starfish | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

    Tom Shows Harland Williams His Chocolate Starfish | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
    May 26 2025
    Check out the newest podcast from YMH Studios "Not A Damn Chance"! Hosted by pro skateboarder Neen Williams and Michelin-starred chef Phillip Frankland Lee SPONSORS: - Get started at https://factormeals.com/bears50off and use code bears50off to get 50% off plus FREE shipping on your first box. - Make friends and grab some merch at https://www.drinkporosos.com/ This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Bert is on a retreat in Istanbul so Tom Segura is joined by the brilliantly bizarre Harland Williams for an unhinged episode packed with supposedly true stories, bootyholes, and too many farts. Harland kicks things off by reminiscing about fingering calamari and the first time someone touched his arse—with a thermometer. Tom shares the traumatic moment he had to show a friend his infamously hairy sphincter... and yes, he ends up showing Harland too. Surprisingly, the conversation spirals into absurd territory with erotic drawings, smut searches, fart-catching attempts, a Dominican dick flash, and a deep dive into Enny’s alleged fondness for buttholes. Harland doesn’t disappoint either—he reacts to fart videos, tells a story about dating Madonna, and looks forward to tanning with Tom. The two also talk about creativity, recreational drugs, Harland's distrust of nicotine pouches, the anthems of both Canada and Texas, plus playing doctor, and horseshoes with neck pillows. Oh, and Harland names his favorite dictator. Stick around to find out if Harland ends up eating Tom. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 290 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:02:55 - Arses & Calamari Rings 00:14:34 - So Much Hair 00:26:10 - What's Going On With Canada? 00:31:24 - Measurements, Buzzes, & Vices 00:41:37 - Favorite Dictator 00:51:49 - Dating Madonna 00:55:46 - Clip: Baddie Farts 00:56:49 - Play Back The Tape 00:58:13 - Clip: Fart In One 00:59:29 - Tanning & Tour Dates 01:05:45 - Gas, Gashes, & Gruesome Videos 01:11:48 - Harland Wants To Eat Tom Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hora e 20 minutos
  • Bad Thoughts About Meghan Markle | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

    Bad Thoughts About Meghan Markle | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
    May 19 2025
    SPONSORS: - Grab your tickets at https://NASCAR.com/tickets. If you can’t make it, grab a beer and your friends, find your seat on the couch, and gear up for some of the best racing in the world at Charlotte Motor speedway. Tune in to the Coca Cola 600 this Sunday at 6:00 PM Eastern - Brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit https://betterhelp.com/bears to get 10% off your first month - Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/bears. - Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans at https://mintmobile.com/BEARS. This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer go deep on Tom’s new Netflix series Bad Thoughts — a disturbing, hilarious, and brilliantly unhinged ride that Charo absolutely hated. The Bears talk about favorite sketches, behind-the-scenes moments, bloopers, and why Bert is both joking and not joking about not being cast. They dive into the art of acting, working with writers, and getting lost in characters — plus Bert’s dream roles if he had been invited. Also: Tom's Italian guy character, hair insecurity, Kevin James dying his beard, and Tom's preference for a show that doesn't look like a comedy. Elsewhere, Bert shares his Post Malone + Jelly Roll solo mission, NASCAR plans, and recent attempts at eating clean and not drinking again. There’s debate over royal titles, Meghan Markle, Prince William, and a killer impression of the royal family worrying about baby skin tone. Plus: Bert’s mail opening trauma, how he weighs himself, cauliflower pizza, bar takeovers, and why Tom might actually like who he is. It’s full sketch comedy breakdown meets chaotic Bear therapy—don’t miss it. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 289 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:20 - Tom Talks Bad Thoughts 00:13:50 - Cinematography & Awkward Sex Scenes 00:21:45 - Casting Choices & Putting Friends In Movies 00:33:23 - Tom's Acting, Bert's "Sobriety", & NASCAR 00:40:20 - The Royals & Meghan Markle 00:55:01 - Bills 01:03:01 - Big Boys 01:09:31 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hora e 8 minutos
  • Welcome to 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

    Welcome to 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
    May 12 2025
    Weekly, comedian best friends Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer get together in the bear cave at YMH Studios to do what bears do: make each other laugh. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 minuto
  • Ripping Beers & Running 5K's w/ Jason Kelce, N.O.R.E, and Beau Allen | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

    Ripping Beers & Running 5K's w/ Jason Kelce, N.O.R.E, and Beau Allen | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
    May 12 2025
    SPONSORS: - Head to https://bubblycleaning.com/Bears to get your first 3 hours of cleaning for only $19. Thanks so much to Bubbly Cleaning for sponsoring this episode! - Head to https://acorns.com/bears or download the Acorns app to get started. - Start your free online visit today at https://Hims.com/BEARS. - Upgrade your wallet today! Get 10% Off @Ridge with code CAVE at https://www.Ridge.com/CAVE #Ridgepod - Order a bottle of Por Osos and some killer merch online https://drinkporosos.com This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kershire are LIVE from the 2 Bears 5k in Tampa Bay Florida! They aren't alone either, the bears are joined by not one, not two, but three guest bears! Joining Tom and Bert are rapper/running enthusiast N.O.R.E, as well as, former NFL players/Super Bowl champs, Jason Kelce and Beau Allen. The group all get together to talk about the real challenges of the 2 Bears 5k, who the best drinkers are, running, nicknames, dictators, Hype Williams, stupid purchases, and so much more. Enjoy the show! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 288 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:17 - N.O.R.E 00:14:48 - Japanese Whiskey 00:20:12 - Beau Allen & Jason Kelce 00:26:33 - The Best Drinkers & Worst NFL Matchups 00:35:33 - Nicknames & Dictators 00:42:02 - Hype Williams 00:45:39 - NFL Rookies 00:53:51 - Drinking Before A Big Game 00:58:23 - Stupid Purchases 01:06:16 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hora e 9 minutos
  • MrBallen Traumatizes Tom Segura | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

    MrBallen Traumatizes Tom Segura | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
    May 5 2025
    Check out MrBallen’s channel here: https://www.youtube.com/@MrBallen SPONSORS: - Buy Jack Link's Duos at https://JackLinks.com/DUOS or at your local convenience, gas, grocery store or subscribe and save on Amazon. - Get up to $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at https://square.com/go/bears! #squarepod - Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://BlueChew.com! And we’ve got a special deal for our listeners: Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code BEARS -- just pay $5 shipping. - Brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit https://BetterHelp.com/bears to get 10% off your first month. On this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura is joined by the legendary storyteller himself—MrBallen! Get ready for an epic conversation as they dive into some of the wildest true crime mysteries and horror stories, including the chilling unsolved case of the Yuba County Five and a gruesome incident on an oil rig that will haunt your dreams. They also explore mind-blowing topics like habitable exoplanets, Katy Perry’s space adventure, and MrBallen’s incredible journey from Navy SEAL to YouTube sensation. Don't miss this one—it's a mix of mystery, mayhem, and a whole lot of laughs. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 287 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:15 - The Strange, Dark, & Mysterious World Of MrBallen 00:07:29 - Why True Crime? 00:14:03 - The Stories That Stick With You 00:28:10 - The Yuba County Five 00:35:45 - Exoplanets 00:40:57 - Katy Perry In Space 00:44:47 - First Day On Seal Team 2 00:58:44 - New Career Path 01:10:06 - Grenade Moment Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hora e 18 minutos
  • The Blue Origin Broads Backlash w/ Thomas Lennon | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

    The Blue Origin Broads Backlash w/ Thomas Lennon | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
    Apr 28 2025
    Check out Bert's new special "Lucky" streaming on Netflix! The 2 Bears 5k is this Sunday! There’s still time to sign up and join us in Tampa at Raymond James Stadium! Sign up at https://www.2bears5k.com/#intro SPONSORS: - Go to https://shipstation.com and use code CAVE to sign up for your FREE trial. - Learn more about Lightstrike at https://Drinklightstrike.com or follow on TikTok and Instagram @drinklightstrike. - You can find Cremo’s new line of antiperspirants and deodorants at Target or https://Target.com - Get started at https://factormeals.com/bears50off and use code bears50off to get 50 percent off plus FREE shipping on your first box. - Head to https://policygenius.com to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save. This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Bert Kreischer is joined by legendary funnyman and certified bear Thomas Lennon for one of the wildest rides yet. No stranger to confrontations, Thomas tells Bert some stories about a fight he got into in the real-world and the internet. They dive into the Amazon reviews of Mein Kampf, unpack the all-female Blue Origin space flight, and debate which celebs should be launched into orbit next. Thomas also opens up about working with Christopher Nolan, shares the weirdest thing he’s ever used his fame for, and the two squirm over some spelunking stories. The two also discuss claustrophobia, Tom's basketball injury, suicide pods in Switzerland, and whether getting beat up by a woman is a fair fight. From film criticism to Karen moments, to the legendary Pink Palace, this episode has it all! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 286 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:23 - Mein Kampf 00:06:34 - Women In Space 00:11:03 - Happy Endings 00:18:18 - Back To The Lady Astronauts 00:22:37 - Thrill Seeking 00:26:00 - Caves 00:35:53 - A Funny Death 00:40:05 - Fame 00:45:47 - Tom's Broken Body 00:49:37 - Swiss Unalive Pods 00:56:38 - The Man Who Would Be King 00:59:44 - Christopher Nolan Movies 01:07:24 - Film Criticism 01:22:27 - Confrontations 01:34:57 - Cop Stuff 01:39:34 - Karen Moments 01:42:57 - Can't We All Just Get Along 01:49:38 - Couples Therapy & The Space Draft 01:55:31 - Body Acceptance Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    2 horas e 3 minutos
  • Sampling Your Own Sauce | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

    Sampling Your Own Sauce | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
    Apr 21 2025
    Check out Bert's new special "Lucky" streaming on Netflix! The 2 Bears, 5K in Tampa is less than 2 weeks away! Sign up at https://www.2bears5k.com/#intro SPONSORS: - Shop data plans at https://MINTMOBILE.com/BEARS. - Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/bears. - Brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit https://betterhelp.com/bears to get 10% off your first month. This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Bert Kershire and Tim Segura are hooked up to IV's as they recover from their gay bar takeover and all the love the received from all those hungry bears. They talk Instagram FOMO, the magic of minority women making meals for their husbands, a chola influencer named La Sleep that Bert is obsessed with, and the performative nature of social media. They also talk about the appeal of the Kelce brothers to gays, share the unique name of a cocktail that was invented at the takeover, debate which group of people gives the best compliments, and finally they tackle the subject of sampling your own sauce, which means exactly what you think it means. Enjoy the show! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 285 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:56 - Post Takeover IV Drip 00:08:56 - Watches 00:15:31 - Car Guys & Dogs 00:21:15 - Bert Is A Mexican Woman 00:28:28 - Gay Black Couple Meals 00:33:10 - The Cholo Life 00:36:51 - Instagram FOMO 00:45:51 - Gay Compliments 00:53:53 - Kelce Bears, UTI's, & Sampling Your Own Sauce 01:01:22 - Clip: Drinking An Ari Cocktail 01:08:35 - How Much To Taste? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hora e 16 minutos
  • Bert Choke Slammed Two Dudes | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

    Bert Choke Slammed Two Dudes | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
    Apr 14 2025
    Check out Bert's new special "Lucky" streaming on Netflix! The 2 Bears, 5K in Tampa is less than a month away! Sign up at https://www.2bears5k.com/#intro SPONSORS: - Start your free online visit today at https://Hims.com/BEARS. - Today get 20% off your DeleteMe plan by texting CAVE to 64000. - Shop data plans at https://MINTMOBILE.com/BEARS - Head to https://acorns.com/bears or download the Acorns app to get started. - Get 20% OFF + Free Shipping @MANSCAPED with promo code BEARS at https://manscaped.com! #ManscapedPartner #TCSociety Tom and Bert are back in the cave and things get spicy fast. This week the Bears dive into alternative p*rn genres you didn’t know you needed, celebrate the beauty of international women, and break down the logic and logistics behind the noble art of “homie head.” They also mentally prepare for a Por Osos gay bar takeover and talk the top 5 hot chick accents. Next, Bert recounts his unforgettable Monday Night RAW moment where he went full low-IQ adult and choke slammed two dudes on live TV! Then it’s onto arranged marriages, glory holes, and other socially important topics. Pack a towel, this one gets sweaty. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 284 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:02:23 - Alternative P*rn 00:07:41 - Normalize Homie Head 00:14:11 - Por Osos Gay Bar Takeover 00:18:58 - Bert Choke Slammed Two Dudes 00:31:25 - The Wrestling Bug 00:40:15 - Retirement Community Idea 00:45:42 - International Delights 00:51:31 - Hottest Chick Accents 00:59:22 - Arranged Marriages 01:04:10 - Glory Holes, Milking Tables, & Sexy Nurses 01:09:51 - MSG & Summer Break 01:17:56 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hora e 20 minutos